i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize