fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
