Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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