And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
