I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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