Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
