The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
