I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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