You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
You did what with his pubic hair?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
