whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
