but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
