Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
