i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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