can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
