i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
