So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
