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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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