I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
