I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
How naked do you want me to be?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
