margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
