No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
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