Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
