"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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