So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize