So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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