we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
