Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
