I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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