Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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