mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
i drank out of a bidet.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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