I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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