Im at strip club and am horny
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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