dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Randomize
