I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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