Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My ass is underappreciated
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
