I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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