i wish peter jackson would direct porn
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
