Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
