I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
did you just send me my own nude
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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