forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize