Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
