hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
