I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
This house was built for laser tag.
two words: eviction party
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
