East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Randomize
