Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I fill condoms, not promises.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
