no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
