..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
