Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Bring me that man meat
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
