worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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