Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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