Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
