he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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